Boys to Men

Dear Lord; Good morning Father!  To start off today, I’d like to thank You for the emotional “purging” You helped me with yesterday.  Sometimes, the hidden feelings that quietly eat at our spirits are the hardest to control, and it feels absolutely wonderful to have laid that one down.  Every negative I can shed brings me that much closer to You.

As You know, for Christmas I got both my boys new Children’s Bibles.  These are lovely books Lord, which tell Your story and give Your Word to them in a way that they’re excited to read each night.  Most evenings I’ve been reading with Aidan, but he’s also taken to reading some of it on his own and has just been devouring the stories.  We’re almost completely through Genesis, and both my boys are amazed and filled with wonder at Your Power and Love for Your Children.  I’ve been thrilled to see them so enthralled with learning about You, and I pray it continues to interest and excite them.  Jonathan has taken to reading our daily conversations as well, and it warms my heart that he wants to know You so much more.  I so want to raise these boys to be God-Loving, compassionate and righteous men.

“Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.” – Proverbs 22:6

Heavenly Father, please help me continue to bring Your Loving Presence into my childrens’ lives.  Fill them with the Holy Spirit, and make Your Heavenly Light shine through them so all may see Your Influence.  I pray that You grant me the wisdom, the strength and the resolve to help them be the men I know they can be.  Amen.

~Phather Phil

Morning Realizations

Dear Lord; Good morning Father!  Well, once again You’ve set the conversation topic for our morning chat.  Here I was all ready to talk about plans for the new year, and then You intervened and kept redirecting me to discuss the morning rush at our house.

Well Father, as You know weekday mornings at our home tend to be a little on the chaotic side.  I’m the light sleeper in the house, so when the alarm goes off it’s me that gets up to start things rolling for the day (Shannon could sleep through a small nuclear device being detonated nearby… LOL).  The first 15 minutes of the day becomes a flurry of activity between running dogs out, to waking up children and finally prompting Shannon until she stirs as well.  Some days are better than others, but no matter what my “Wake Up Call” is never a welcomed experience by the rest of the household.  The balance of the next hour is spent getting everyone clean, clothed, fed and ready to get out the door in time.  All in all Lord, it’s a mad rush by four half-awake people that quite often leads to frustrations flaring up.

As they did this morning.

It’s funny, but I wasn’t sure what You meant when You whispered to me that we needed to talk about my mornings and almost dismissed it, but when I heard You clearly a second time it started me analyzing the morning ritual in general, and how it affects me.  Then I recognized Your intention… I’ve become resentful of being the one who has to be the “bad guy” each morning and hadn’t realized it.  Wow… What a powerful and worrisome realization that was.

Well Lord, once again You’ve made me pull out a demon I wasn’t aware of into the sunlight.

It hurts my heart to think I’ve become resentful of helping my family with anything they need, even though it’s not a happy task.  It’s a necessary role, and one that I’m best suited for.  I need to leave these feelings at Your Feet Lord, and do ALL I can for my family with love and care.

Heavenly Father, I thank You for helping me see this poison in my heart for what it is.  I pray that You help me release it from my spirit, and wake each morning with a joyous heart in the knowledge that I’m performing a loving act for those I hold dear.  Amen.

~Phather Phil

Back to the Fold

Dear Lord; Well Father, the New Year is certainly upon us.  However, instead of talking about new beginnings today, I want to go over last weekend if I may.  As we’ve discussed at length, 2010 was in many ways an amazingly difficult year for myself and my family.  Well, as of Friday morning I had yet one more potentially serious business nightmare crop up to finish off my year, and I’m afraid I crumbled.  It was the proverbial last straw on the camel’s back, and I spent the bulk of my day sitting quietly in our bedroom, avoiding the world.  I tried for quite some time to speak with You Lord, but I just couldn’t seem to let go of the troubles in my heart and open up that line of communication.  I felt lost, and beaten, and angry, and alone.

I was of course none of those things, but at the time I couldn’t see past my own turmoil to realize it.  Once again, You intervened through others to bring me back.  Shannon and I were to attend a New Years Eve party that night, and although I was holding onto my pain she convinced me to keep our plans all the same.  It ended up being just what was needed to get me out of the self-induced shell I was hiding in.  The evening was spent surrounded by a fun group of friends, and I was able to finally release the hold that fear had placed on my heart.

The rest of the weekend continued on an upwards trend, and by Sunday afternoon I was back to my old self once again.  I was able to start the week today with a positive direction, and a joyous heart knowing that as always, You were there to see me through, even when I wasn’t paying attention.

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.” – Joshua 1:9

Thank You Father, for always being there to guide and help us even when our own frailties make us blind to Your Presence.  Amen.

~Phather Phil

Looking Forward…

Dear Lord; Good morning Father!  Yesterday, our conversation focused on the events of the year we’re about to leave behind, and what I’ve learned from it.  Therefore, today I thought we’d talk about moving forward, and some of the things I’d like to focus on for the upcoming year.

In holding with the last few Holiday posts I’ve made, I’d like to let my boys send their thoughts to You as well.  To that end, I asked them this morning what they were hoping 2011 would bring and what they were going to focus on to help make a positive change in their lives.

Here’s what they said :

Jonathan ( Age 11 ) – “I’d like to be able to spend more time with my family.  I want to learn how to do karate.  I want to spend more time with our friends and relatives, and have them over more often.  I’m going to be more involved in taking care of our animals.  I want to finish the new Bible I got for Christmas and learn more about God.  I’m going to work to be more thankful for the things that I have.”

Aidan ( Age 8 ) – “I’d like to see less crashes happen (car crashes) because I don’t want people to get hurt.  I want me and my friends to have a fun time in school.  I’d like my family to spend more time together.  I want less animals to get abandoned.  I’m going to finish reading my new Action Bible with Daddy and really want to learn about God.  I’m going to work to get better at reading so I can read bigger books.  I want to spend more time exercising.  And I want to wish God a Happy New Year.”

They’re still one of my biggest inspirations Lord, and I see so much of You in them each day.

As for myself, well I’m not big on New Years Resolutions but there are some things I’m planning on focusing on this coming year.

• As I mentioned yesterday, it’s been a rough year for my business.  I’m very much dedicated to it’s success, and I’m going to work diligently to get it back to the stability it once had.
• Although we are Blessed to have a very stable and wonderful home life, there’s always room for me to improve my contribution.  I’m going to continue to work to be a better husband and father, and set as positive an example for my boys as I can.
• 2010 was an amazing year for my personal growth in You Lord, and I want very much to expand on that in the coming year as well.  The closer I work to walk in Christ’s footsteps, the more I find the rest of my life gains meaning and direction.  I’m also dedicated to bringing Your Light into my children’s lives, and teaching them the Love and Guidance You provide us every day.

Heavenly Father, I humbly pray that over the coming year Your Amazing Gift of Grace is felt by all Your Children.  May we all experience the Joy in Serving Your Will, and walk the Path that Jesus has set for us in Your Holy Name.  Amen.

~Phather Phil

Looking Back…

Dear Lord; Well Father, it’s almost the end of another year.  It’s certainly been a roller coaster, and I’ve spent quite a bit of time the last few days reflecting on everything that’s transpired.

Financially, 2010 has been a nightmare for myself and my business.  Coming off a very positive 2009, the first half of this year saw one drain after another as the crippled economy took it’s toll on our clients.  We adjusted as best we could, and gained some ground back mid-year, but even today we’re still dealing with digging our way out of the hole that was created.  And like any other business owner, that shortfall has carried through to my personal finances, putting a significant strain on our household income.  The one positive financial change that happened this year was the additional income produced by the wonderful new job Shannon got in September.  It hasn’t completely balanced out the deficit, but it’s been an amazing Blessing to our household during these rough times.

Family health was all over the board this year as well.  On the positive side, Jonathan’s disease has stayed in remission and he’s done very well this year.  Thank You for that amazing Blessing!  Shannon had a couple of injuries during the year, including seriously straining her back in the spring and later in the year bruising her tailbone.  I managed to get Lyme Disease in the late spring, which caused me some significant issues, but other than some continuing joint discomfort that too seems to be staying at bay.  Other than that, we’ve all had bouts of the typical Delaware sinus crud but have remained for the most part, healthy.

This year was not without it’s heartache as well Father.  Following a painful battle with cancer, my best friend of 26 years left us to join You in August.  He was a wonderful man, the best man at my wedding, and Jonathan’s Godfather and we all miss him very much.  I take great solace however in the fact that he’s no longer in pain, and is now dwelling in Your Kingdom.

On the positive side though Father, we’ve had a number of wonderful things happen this year as well.  As I mentioned earlier, Shannon got a new job this year that has been an amazing fit for her as well as providing us with some additional income.  It’s wonderful to see her come home feeling appreciated, and fulfilled with what she’s doing, and I’m very proud of her.  We had another fantastic family vacation this summer in the Pocono Mountains.  We’ve come to really love Chestnut Grove, and the kids are already looking forward to going back there again this coming year.  Over the summer Shannon and I also celebrated our 15^th Wedding Anniversary with a surprise (to her anyways) Renewal of Vows Ceremony led by the Pastor that married us.  It was a wonderful affair with family and friends in attendance, and a time of great joy for us both.  And finally, a few weeks back Lord I was truly Blessed to be able to act as Your Emissary to bring two good friends together in the bonds of Holy Matrimony.  That was an amazing honor, and Your Presence was obvious to all that attended.

On the Blessings side Lord, I have actually quite a few to Praise You for.  My marriage to Shannon has never been stronger.  She’s an amazing lady Father, and my love for her continues to grow deeper with each passing year.  My children are growing, and learning, and happy, and healthy and dreaming Father.  They’re my light and my inspiration, and I thank You so much for making them a part of my life.  We’re surrounded by wonderful friends, and we feel their love and caring on a regular basis.  And possibly most importantly Father, this year has been an amazing time for my personal growth in You.  I feel Your Presence in my life more and more every day, and give Thanks and Praise for Your Grace in my journey to You.  And although this has been a tumultuous time for many of us, I’m quite secure in my Faith that in You, all things are possible.  Amen.

~Phather Phil